Vulnerable/The Process

I packed my baggage
took up flight
didn’t know where I was going
knew what I was in search of
not sure where or when I’d find it
not sure if I’d recognize it when I did
just instinct guiding me
I knew it had to be done
to save my life
to breathe again
to feel alive pure whole
I guess I had forgotten
the heartache
the sadness the loneliness
how the high always seems worth the withdrawal
Loving as if life were a pair of shoes
I could exchange for a better fit
I never expected to come down this hard
I keep chasing a feeling that isnt there
this is all too familiar
I’ve been here before
the outcome is always the same
you give alot
take a little
then just like it began
its over
you heal wounds
mend hearts
all the while inflicting pain on yourself
tearing a little more at the already fragile
remains of what once were your hopes your dreams
staring in the face of your reality your truth your losses
no redos no re-takes no refunds and sorry no exchanges
just an open book with all the vivid images fused permanently there
no choice
and nothing but time left to reminisce.